Metal Gear Solid: Amel's Beauty

It's been four days since my last post here. I actually started another journal for myself. I posted there Monday, and I started exercising. I don't know exactly what I am going to do with it, but I have an idea in my head. As for the other days, I wasn't feeling up to writing on Tuesday, and Wednesday I had an appointment to keep.

Monday I got irritated because I had to stay up late, in order to go on the internet. We only have one phone line, and five 1/2 people living here (LOL). Two of them are tweens, well actually one of them is a tween. She still talks on the phone forever. My problem is, that I like to stay online for a long time, and well my sisters (rightfully so) want to stay on the phone a long time too. So I made a decision to call AOL and get AOL broadband. I got the $25.09 deal that AOL has been advertising, for the past 7 months here. They also kept sending me emails about it. I got it Wednesday and I couldn't leave my computer after the hook up. I remember the representative telling me Monday that this would happen to me. Boy was he right, I must been online for four hours straight, and I would have been late for work, if one of my friends online didn't mention something that sparked my memory. When I came home, I stayed online to nearly 1am in the morning chatting. I think that same day the first Journal I visited was This, and That and Hockey, because I been wanting to read D's journal and see her animations for some time, but my computer would take forever to load it, because of the animations.

Today, I took my new found speed to new heights, and I looked at two of Amel Larrieux's videos. I couldn't before, because we don't have cable. So I ended up watching the choppy/crummy dial-up versions. Today I got to see her beautiful face (sigh of happiness) in a clear stream. It made me so happy that I almost cried (not really crying) .

I also went to one of my favorite websites. I hadn't been there in awhile because of the lack of speed (I was the coyote). Now I am going to go there and explore a little more. Newgrounds is a cool website, but it has some questionable content that I wouldn't recommend. I mean who would want to dress celebrities? I like there flash movies, most of them make crack up until fall to the floor and start foaming at the mouth. If you have ever played Metal Gear Solid you can relate to this Parody that I found on Newgrounds. It's called Metal Gear: Awesome, and it had me dying (Warning if you don't like toilet humor, stay away!) Now I am going to look for that Atari Kung Fu Game that I played as a kid. Someone made a flash version of it and made it thousand times better, and funnier!

Then I am gonna Eat!

Searchin' For, Searchin' For, Searchin' For my Screen Name

Okay, Okay DesLily recently answered a question that I was curious to find out. She revealed how she came up with her screen name. Then she asked to tell the story behind our screen name if it isn't the same as our real name.

Here we go!

It all started after my mother cancelled her ISP (can't remember the name of it) in 1999. I decided to get AOL. When I first signed with AOL back in 2000 I had to come up with a screen name, as part of the sign up. I wanted something that no one else had. My first yahoo screen name was AllCharles (all mines). I thought about getting that, but it was "All" used up as far as I was concerned. I kept trying different things, but all of my ideas were taken, and then I noticed a suggestion in small print telling me to use two of my favorite songs as part of my screen name (here it comes). Anyone that has read my blog before knows who my favorite singer is right. Dare I say it...Amel Larrieux! I used two of her songs. They are called I N I, and Searching For My Soul. I came up with inisoul. Both songs had some things in it that I could relate to at that time.

Unfortunately as far as my screen name is concerned I cancelled my AOL service later the same year and went to Net Zero for a couple of years and then cancelled it because it didn't agree with my mothers computer. After a hiatus from the internet I came back to AOL in August 2004, and I tried to get inisoul back as my login, but once you use a screen name and cancel you can use it again. You can only use it for instant messaging. So I decided to add the "C" because of my name. That's how my screen name became cinisoul. I can finally catch my breath. LOL

V for Vaccine M for Movie I for Internet

Okay this is so why I am going to get something other than dial-up. I went online yesterday and I was going to read some journals, and maybe even post an entry (maybe not). Then I was asked why I was online, and didn't I read the note. I guess my sister was expecting a phone call. I new about the letter, but I didn't care. I just wanted to read and pass some time. Okay, I admit it was wrong, and I was being selfish, but other than going online, I don't have much of a life (which is something I intend to change). I didn't know why my sister needed the phone to stay clear, until I was told that she was expecting a phone call from a doctor in regards to Jalani's circumcision. He still hasn't gotten it yet, and now that I think about it, I hope that he doesn't get it taken care of until one of us (my sister or myself) has moved out.

So after it was all said and done, I decided to go to the movies and see V for Vendetta. It was pretty good movie, cleverly written, and like in The Matrix movies Hugo Weaving proves that he has the Gift Of Gab. I know he didn't write it, but he sure spoke his lines very well, especially the one scene where just about every word he said started with a V. I can add him to my list of favorite actors and actresses.

Before I went home I had to go to get my computer its medication (LOL) from trojans, worms, and other viruses, because it kept telling me that it's dosage was about to expire. I walked from the movie theatre to Wal-Mart. It was a long walk...see look!



It was 2.64 miles, and it had an estimated time of 6 minutes by car, but not by foot. It took me an hour to get there. By the time I got there I was sweating bullets, and it was cold yesterday. I ended up getting more than what I intended on getting (always). I got a DVD cleaner for the player on my computer. I was hoping that, cleaning it would solve the issue, it didn't. I forgot that it can't even detected any discs in the first place. Stupid DVD/CD drive keeps telling me to insert disc. When I tried to use the power DVD on my computer it said it didn't support "this format". I don't know what's going on with it, so I will just leave it be, until I buy a new one, and install it myself.

After I was done with my shopping, I took the bus back home. There wasn't anyway I was walking home, from Wal-Mart after I walked to Wal-Mart from the theatre. When I got on the bus, I noticed something strange. The seats for this particular model were different. For a second I thought they were different seats, but then I noticed the cloth covering the cushion was the same color as the seats on the other buses like this one. It turned out that they were not different seats at all. Someone at RTS had a bright idea to paint the chairs bright blue, and they did a lousy job at it too.



I'm guessing that they were trying to cover up all of the graffiti on the old girl. It was a good idea (a ghetto idea), but they should have been more thorough. I still like the bus, because it has enough leg room for me. Some of the newer models are a killer on my knees, so I have be aggressive when I get on them and make run for side seats. Which means I either have to sit in the front and hope that no one in a wheel chair gets on, or I have to go all the way to the back and disrespect Rosa Parks memory. I mostly like to sit in the front for that reason. The other reason was because back when I was in middle/high school, all of the "cool" kids would sit in the back of the bus. I admit that I wanted to be "cool", but I wasn't, and I wasn't a dork either. I was somewhere in the middle lost, in the world of teens. So looked towards the front of the bus always, and I have been there for the most part ever since.

Writing this and leaving it behind me. (Hate Be Gone!)

I am just sitting here right now, deciding to do Thursday Thirteen or write what is plaguing my mind this very moment. I guess I am leaning towards the latter, because you would see the Thursday Thirteen banner within this entry. I sorry if I offend someone reading my journal, but I have to get this off of my chest. I am not trying to start any trouble or controversy. I am just venting.

When I am at work I tend to shy away from Drama. I learned my lesson when getting involved other peoples drama. I try to help out, and I end up making matters worse. Someone tell you something (a secret), and it's about a friend and fellow co-worker. What do you do? Keep it to yourself, or let the friend find out you knew and hate you for it. I have been in the middle of some drama before. There was a kind of love triangle going on at work at one point, and two of the three people involved were my friends. They brought me in to Fray, and it nearly destroyed all of our friendships. After that experience I decided that I didn't want anything to do with any rumors, secrets, sex, lies, and videotape. Just leave me alone!

About two weeks ago, a co-worker who shall remain nameless called one of our fellow co-workers a racial slur, twice. Two of his "friends" witnessed him saying this, and one of them told the assistant manager along with the person he said the racial comment to. Some of the employees didn't believe what the witness or the victim of the racial term said, or that the nameless co-worker did such a thing. The witness was so upset that he was getting ready to transfer to another store, but the store manager himself got involved, and asked the other witness to the nameless ones comments, if it were true. Eventually the other witness confirmed what the first witness said was true. So the nameless co-worker has been fired and it should be the end of this right....Wrong! It turned out that the nameless employee had said a racial slur before at one of the assistant managers. Assistant manager 1 told the nameless one to go home, and then the employee went to assistant manager 2 and told him that he was sent home, and that manager told the employee that he isn't going home, and that the other manager didn't have that kind of authority. I don't know what's worse, the fact that assistant manager 2 didn't agree with assistant manager 1's decision after the culprit used a racial term towards assistant manager 1, or that the nameless employee has used these bad words and has gotten away with it. The nameless person is trying to fight this, but if he comes back there is going to be a lot of upset people there. I may even quit if he gets his job back.

Some of my co-workers asked me how I felt about it, and I tried my darndest to stay out of it. I just said I am used to it now. Well I am not! I never will be!

I don't care if you are, employee, employer, president of the United States. If you demean someone, you have no business in the work place. Hatred has no business there, and prejudice is a type of hatred. It's sad that something like this is still happening in our world. I can wake up one morning, and feel like a million bucks, and have someone I don't know say one little word, snatch that feeling away, and make me feel like I am in debt. What did I do to deserve this? What did my two co-workers do to deserve it? Does anyone deserve this? What will it take for to end? Sometimes it can be draining.

A Milestone Missed!

Yesterday I realized something. I went to my AOL Journal and looked at the counter (not to see that it had reset...Darn AOL), and I noticed something. I had a milestone, and it slipped right by me without even a peep. I have been blogging for over a year now (go me!) . March 14, 2005 is my anniversary date. Wow, I didn't even think I would make it this far. I remember when I started writing in my blog, I didn't even know what to write about. Believe it or not, the original title of my journal was "Things about me (Even the little ones)". I changed it because I thought the title was bland. Even my writing seemed kind of bland at one point. I think it got better, when I decided to start sharing a little bit more about myself in J-land.

I remember when I started getting readers, but somehow I managed to scare one away. I was just so enthusiastic with my comments, it must have creeped her out, and she stopped reading my journal, and removed me from her favorites section. I admit it kind of hurt, but hey you learn and move on. She was the first person who's journal I ever commented in, but she didn't have the honor of being my first read.

I don't know exactly how I found his journal, but Detached and Indifferent Expressions was the first journal I read (lurked in). Omar had me cracking up, I couldn't have thought of an idea to post a living will on my journal. The second is full of Color. I like In The Shadow Of The Iris, because it is so beautifully written. At first I lurked around her journal too, but eventually I had no choice to leave a comment, because The Color entry was well written, it was amazing to me. I remember leaving the comment, asking Rebecca if there was anything I can do to recommend that she be the winner of Judith Heartsong's Essay Contest (which reminds me is there going to be another one?). I could try and focus all of my energy on writing a entry like Rebecca's and never get close to her writing abilities. The ingredients are there, but I'm not good at following the instructions in the recipe book very well. Rebecca left me a comment wishing me a happy birthday and told me to keep writing. That comment along with Omar's sense humor in his journal entries help me along, and inspired me to keep writing, when I was ready to give up. Blogging has had it's ups and downs. I would have never thought I would have two blogs (AOL's Fault) let alone a third coming up soon.

If I have learned anything about blogging its that there are some good people out there in the world. It's been fun, hopefully it will continue to be in the future. I know I have some people lurking around my journal. Feel free to comment or just say Hi. Even leave your Blog Address so I read yours.

Later!

The Final Battle, A New Beginning

Remember my nemesis? At first we were the best of friends, we were inseparable. I need them more than they needed me though. You can go and read this entry and find out how we became the greatest of enemies of all time. We were like struggling with each other back and forth. It would try to find ways to outsmart me, and I would find ways to prevent his plots of revenge. Now I realize however that it wasn't revenge that my nemesis was looking for. My nemesis was looking for an end. An end to the horrifying "Introduction" (I bet it still has nightmares). I tried to save them by going to The "Empire of Optometrist" to get help, I was told that it only have a short time to live. So I found creative ways to keep my nemesis going until I could find a new ally. Who is my nemesis? It's my very first pair of glasses, which broke a week before my 30 birthday (what a gift).



Without them I had headaches galore, with them I could see some more. That's why I thought my glasses were out to get me. I thought they wanted me to suffer as much as they did when I introduced them to my butt. The hole where the screw had fallen out was stripped, after I sat on my glasses. So a screw wouldn't work anymore. I had found an ingenious way to temporarily solve the problem, I used needle and thread to encase the lens in the frame. I sewed the thread threw the screw hole several times (a lot of times actually), until both ends of the frame that had the lens in it were together again. Then I placed the lens in and tightened the thread, and I tied knots. It worked, and I even inspired one of my co-workers to do the same thing after her boyfriend sat on her glasses. Originally I had thread showing on the outside of the frame, but after the second attempt I figured out that it would work with the thread on the inside (the part of the frame facing my eyes). That way no one could see the thread. Then I realized it worked even better for some reason. The thread wouldn't get loose for along time until last week....

Last week when I was walking home my lens popped out, luckily I saw it as it was happening and I got my lens. Luckily it fell and slid to the edge of the curb (yeah luckily). The next day I went to work and I told my co-worker Shannon about what happened, and we got a little chuckle. That night when I walked home my lens popped out (again), and this time I didn't realize it. I was deep in thought over the issue with my friend and the invite to her party, and I was lost in the music in my MP3. When I got home, I took my glasses off, because the remaining lens became foggy, which in turn notified me that there was something wrong here. "Why is one lens foggy and the other isn't?" It's simple, because the stupid thing fell out. I became very upset, and my mom suggested that I go and look for it. It's a long walk to and from work, and it was windy out. So I decided to only walk as far as the end of my street, and I found nothing (no surprise). I decided that I would look for it on my way to work the next day, but it snowed (if it ain't one thing...). My nemesis got it's victory over me, it has won. Let the headaches commence, let the blurry and fuzzy vision reign supreme, and let everyone's faces turn blank. Let the anger rise, let the frustrations come in with the tide, and let the complaints commence.

Yesterday I went and bought a new pair of glasses at Lens Crafters with part of my Federal income tax refund. I didn't get the chance to burn a hole in my pocket. Hopefully the $300.00 I spent is a good investment. Hopefully this time around I won't traumatized or introduce my new glasses to my butt. I learned from my last experience. I guess I can call it a practice run. My sister Ablah admitted to me that she didn't like my nemesis. She likes my new pair of glasses, and so do I.

Am I Thinking That?

Am I

Destined to be alone

Even within my dreams

Am I

Supposed to say I'm fine

When on the inside all I hear are screams

Am I Thinking That ?

Thinking That

I will always be afraid

Thinking that

Within the depths of fear my heart awaits

Thinking That

Inside there is something special to see

Thinking That

Being timid will be the end of me

Am I Thinking That?

Why do I keep thinking that I am never going to find peace

Why do I keep thinking that I am a burden, wasting the air I breathe

Why do I keep thinking that I am going insane

So many questions, Yet I have only one brain

And One Soul

Am I thinking That?

My Heart

I am thinking that

you want freedom

My Heart

I am thinking that

You want joy

My Heart

I am thinking that

You will rise above the sorrow

My Heart

I am thinking that

Wherever there is rain sunshine will follow

Am I Thinking That?

Neglect is illegal...

...But as far as I know I can't go to jail for neglecting myself. Lately I have been letting things in my life slip by me.

1. We all know that my love life sucks. I have let at least three women in my life slip by me and I didn't even try (not once) to tell them how I felt, and then it was too late. The first I never told her how I felt about her, because she claimed that she wouldn't date a guy that is younger than her (I am a month and three days younger than her). The second, I gathered up the courage and told her, but by then she was already involved with someone (too late, story of my life). The third one, didn't even bother, because I felt that I was out of her league. I thought that she was just so beautiful, and I felt that she would deserve better than me. So now I am in limbo as far as love is concerned. I don't even try to converse, because sometimes I am like Checkov when Captain Kirk is around (Can't get the girl). Better yet I am like Harry Kim on Voyager, I fall for the wrong girl, or the impossible girl.

2. I have been neglecting this one in a lot of facets of my life. I have deliberately hid and removed it from my life and my blog, because I see it almost everyday of my life. Red used to be my number one favorite color, but I have hidden it or removed it from my life because to me it represents my struggles and my anger, and my pain (what do you think blue represent to me?). Well there is also the fact that my the uniform shirt at work is red, and I have to wear the color almost everyday at work. I am not going to deny the color red anymore. Red is a part of me, and it will always be apart of me. I mean think of three of my favorite characters....


Fievel From the move An American Tail. Blue Hat, red shirt, and Blue pants. (We're a duo, a duo, A pair of lonely ones who were meant to be a two. Oh, a duo, it's true-o, wherever we go, we're going me and you!)


Autobots, Transform and roll Out!



Spider Sense Tingling!

So I won't deny the color red anymore, because I have some favorite moments involving my other favorite color.

I have been up since 4 this morning, and I started this post just before 6am. It's now 8:06am and I figured out that I have been neglecting something else. I have been neglecting my big head. It's time for me to get a new pillow! How do I know, I am glad you asked. It has become unfluffable (is that a word). I can't fluff the pillow anymore. The life of the feathers inside have fluffed out! I am so freakin' fluffed I could rip my fluffin' pillow apart and fluff the feathers down the toilet. This last month has been kind of a pain in the neck, because I would wake up with a pain in my neck, and then I would proceed to complain about the pain in my neck. But here is the funny part, it wouldn't register in my fluffin' brain that I needed a new pillow. I have been to Wal-Mart this month and instead of getting a pillow I got two games, and a memory card for my MP3 player. You'd think, that I would remember sleep is a necessity. Unfortunately, for me so are pillows! Too bad there isn't an "Ultimate Pillow" out there! One where fluffing isn't required. Either a self-fluffer (fluffinator), or a pillow that doesn't need fluffing (Just stop, drop and snore). I need some snoring time!

A Sneeze of Thought

Question…How many of you were taught to cover your mouths when you were a child? I was taught that it was rude, and unclean when you don't cover your mouth while you are coughing or sneezing, especially in a persons presence. “Andy (nickname) don’t cough in ____’s face”! Last night one of our regular customers handed me his winning instant lottery tickets to cash, and then he started coughing in my face. At first he looked like he was turning to cover his mouth, but he didn’t. He continued to cough and finally realized that I was there, he made and attempt to cover his mouth. It wasn’t a good attempt, because I could see most of his hand above his upper lip and I could see the bottom of his mouth while he was coughing. Then when I gave him his money, the customer used the hand he was coughing with to take it, and he touched my hand with it. I grabbed some hand sanitizer with the quickness, because I didn’t want to be sick. When I get sick, I have trouble breathing and trouble sleeping.

After he started walking away from the desk he started coughing again. He didn’t cover his face at all, and I saw a woman in his path staring at him, looking in disgust. Having him do that is totally rude, and a little gross. How would he like it if I sneezed in his face? He wouldn’t like it at all would he? Every time I sneeze at work I wipe my hands a wipe, or I use hand sanitizer. If I didn’t it would be rude and unprofessional, am I right?

A few minutes after he left I was thinking about a the segment on bird flu that I saw on the news a couple of nights ago. They showed a worse case scenario that I didn’t like. As many as 142 million people around the world could die if bird flu turns into a "worst case" influenza pandemic, according to a sobering new study of its possible consequences.

So after seeing this I was thinking Bird Flu can soon be coming to a city or town near you. A deadly strain of bird flu could appear in the United States in the next few months as wild birds migrate from infected nations, Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff said.

If someone came into my job and they were sick, and they started coughing and hacking, what am I supposed to do. I won't know if they have the bird flu, heck I won’t know if they have Influenza. For all I know the “customer” could have SARS (When was the last time you heard about that). Will we as employees be allowed to wear face masks (That will be the day, I can hear the term “Unprofessional“)? What can I do then, call the union, choose my health over making ends meat? People in retail are the most vulnerable. We deal with hundreds of customers a week, with no protection whatsoever. If or when the bird flu hit’s the U.S., I hope that we as a country (as a community) are ready. Then again SARS was supposed to be a big epidemic heading our way, and it went out with a whimper. Same could be said with the West Nile virus, People died, but there wasn’t a real pandemic. The same could happen with the bird flu. I mean hey, the government either prevented it, or they were wrong about it. I don’t see any Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq. Lets see if the bird flu hits us hard. Then again something on a Grand Scale of Apocalyptic proportions could happen. All of the chess pieces on the chest board representing pestilence could be closing in on us for a checkmate.

Life can be Amazing

Taken the day my brother Jevon had Surgery on his hand!


Nothing interesting happening here. Yesterday I felt a little down (yeah), but I started feeling better. I heard Jalani crying from all of the way upstairs from my bedroom/attic. I went downstairs and talked to him, even though I couldn't understand what he was saying. His pacifier fell out of his mouth so I put it back in. I smiled at my little nephew, as if to say everything is alright. Everything was, except Jalani didn't want to be in his car seat/baby-seat any longer. So I took him out of there and carried him around the house. Finally we both got tired (I think), and I went and sat down on the couch with him. I did something that I never thought I would ever do. I put him to sleep.

Jalani has gotten much heavier since he was that 4lb. 5oz. Baby that I was worried about. Now he is smiling and cooing. It's so cute (yes I said cute). I am so happy to be an uncle. If it wasn't for Jalani, I would have probably been down for the whole week. Just having him let me hold him and put him to sleep made me feel special, made me feel privileged, made me feel happy. I have been feeling kind of lonesome as of late. Holding my nephew in that time made the feeling subside somewhat. Someday I hope that I can tell him that he is important to me, and that he made a difference in my life. Someday, maybe I will even be able to show him this journal entry.

Please Understand, Please Listen with your heart?

My friend's Birthday Party is this Saturday night, and she has invited me to come. I told her that I couldn't make it because I had to work. I do have to work (six days again), and Saturday is one of them. I have to work 3:30pm until 9:30pm and I have to be to work at 7 Sunday morning. That's not the entire reason though. With my friend there is the issue of Drugs and Alcohol. Her and her sister smokes weed, and most of there friends too. I am not into stuff like that. I am agianst drugs and alcohol. I grew up in a home where a man did this stuff, and the things he did to my mom, and the things I heard him talk about made me not ever want to be like him. He beat my mom, he seemed to look for reasons to spank me. I just didn't want anything to do with him.

She knows how I feel about this issue. I told her about the things in my past. She shrugs it off, and says it won't happen to me (Damn right it won't). I'm not gonna let it.

I don't need someone trying to get me to drink or smoke. I need a friend. I need someone who will encourage me to stay steadfast in my beliefs and not compromise my values. I need a friend who can help me see the mistakes I've made in my life and not make them again. I need a friend who will support me, and talk to me when I need an ear or a shoulder to cry on. If you want to change me, get me to listen to some music that I wouldn't normally listen too. You never know, I may learned to like it. If you want to change me, get me to hang out in groups, and be more sociable around people (God knows I need this). Just don't try and make me do drugs or drink alcohol. I've seen what they does to people, the intoxicating effects they have on people, the irrational behavior that they create, the violent acts they cause, the emotional scars and wounds that they re-open. I just don't want to be subjected to them anymore, I don't want to feel anymore pain because of them. The words intoxication speaks for itself. In "Toxic" ation. People are poisoning themselves to feel better.


Why can't she see how I am feeling? What must I do to get her to see my feelings, short of ripping my heart from my chest, or finding a way to project my past into her present. Just thinking about this is making me upset right now (Crying). I listened to her point. I just wanted her to listen to mines, and I don't think I conveyed it to her so she could feel it. Like I said I told her I had to work, but I was GLAD I did, because although I am her friend, I just can't be around people smoking and drinking. I'm sorry that I can't be there for her on her birthday, but it's just to overwhelming. It invokes darkness inside of me, a kind of mind numbing, darkness that makes me sit still and not move. It's worse than when I am around a crowd of people. Not only do I feel the eyes, but I feel like I am being judged as if they think that I think I am better than them, because I don't drink or smoke. No, I just don't have the strength to go through another round of drama involving drugs and alcohol.

Now she has me questioning our friendship! Am I even her friend? Will I ever find that "True Friend" that I have been looking for? Do I even deserve friendship, or love for that matter?

Feline Friday (on Saturday)

Okay i'm awake, i'm up and I remember!




Is it me or....



..are these two competing for my attention?

Let me first point out that I am not even the owner of Bouk or Jet. Yet somehow they both manage to like me, enough to hang around me and my room way too much for me to take sometimes. When Bouk wants to get in my room he stands on his hind legs and stretches his other legs out on the wall beside the door (I have to get a picture of this). Jet on the other hand constantly meows until I either go crazy and start meowing back at him to see if he likes it, or I move him out of the way and step inside my room to make the trek up the stairs. On the rare occasion I let them in and then they start acting like they own the place. Bouk tries to sharpen his claws on the rug, and then he proceeds to sniff everything that he sniffed before. When he is done with this, Bouk will either go to my closet door or lay on my bed. Jet on the other hand will get into anything. If I am coming upstairs Jet tends to run and hide under my bed until he thinks I have changed my mind about him being up in my room. Funny thing is I let him up there in the first place. When "all is clear" Jet will start sniffing everything, bothering Bouk, running behind my television stand and my book shelf that's not used for books. Actually yesterday Jet found something much more interesting to play with in front of the shelf.



My keyboard box with all of my computer information in it. I have know idea what captured his attention over there, but I grabbed my camera for it. He always managed to find something (anything) to get into. So far he hasn't gotten lost in the wall yet. I think I will keep it that way.

Truth or False

Okay this is self-explanatory. Ten Questions All you have to do is answer true or false.

Whoever (even if all of you get them right) gets them all right gets to ask me Ten Questions! (Have until Friday)

1st one's easy!

1. My favorite singer is Janet Jackson.

2. My Dogs names are Bouk and Jet.

3. My sister Ablah drew the picture in my profile.

4. My favorite video game is Final Fantasy X.

5. Scalzi and Joe inspired me to start my own Journal.

6. The first song I posted in my journal was Believe in Love.

7. I consider myself nice.

8. I once did a meme called Secret Sentence.

9. I like Star Wars more than I like Star Trek.

10. My Dad is the reason I like the Buffalo Bills.

So do you think you can get them all right. Give it a shot. Some people have an advantage over others, because I shared info about me in there journals as comments, or have been reading my journals longer than others but hey that doesn't matter, because its all here, or here.

A Question and a Drop

Man, sometimes it can take me forever to answer a question. I guess it could me a memory problem, or lazy problem. Maybe it's a combination of the two. I don't know, but I do know that Deslily's question was a very interesting question that I had to answer. So I am answering it here!

"cute Charles... between this and other posts, it makes me wonder.. Do you enjoy doing word puzzles?"

The answer to that question would have to be Yes! Puzzles do intrigue me. Anything from the jumbles in the newspaper, to figuring out how to put something together. It's relaxing to me for the most part. There was this video game that I wanted when I was a teenager, called Intelligent Qube. "In the game, the player controls a character who must run around a platform made of cubes, capturing certain cubes as they approach. Cubes are captured by marking a spot on the stage, waiting for the cube to roll on top of it, and then capturing it with a button press". I could never find it, because it was a rare sale in the U.S. It made me upset when the clerk told me this. I have the Demo, but you can only go so far with that. I want the full version, and I wish that SCEI would make another one. I would really appreciate it thank you very much.




Recently I have been getting into another type of puzzle called Sudoku. It's all Mal's fault (Thanx Mal its addictive ). I take Sudoku puzzles to work with me everyday now. When I log off from the internet I am going to play me some puzzle games. It's kind of Addicting I went out to Wal-Mart the other night and bought a computer version, and I also bought Tetris (another puzzle game). I like Tetris, in fact I used to play it to death on my Nintendo Gameboy (those were the days). When I stayed with my Aunt Cyndi, she kicked my but in it. I couldn't compete (she kicked my butt), but I really enjoyed spending time with her. Funny thing is, when I opened the Tetris package, there wasn't a disk in the case. I had to have my mother take it back and get a replacement while I was at work. My friend Shannon said that she hoped that they wouldn't give me a hard time about it. They better had not, because I paid for it along with the Sudoku game and a memory card for my Siren MP3 player. It's not like I was trying to get two for the price of one, because all I need is one.



You'll never guess what? Go ahead try, I will give you 20 periods....................

Amel Larrieux is releasing her third album this April called Morning. Can you Say Happy Camper. I mean I had the hugest grin on my face ever. I got up and did my I can't dance, dance, and jumped for joy. The next thing I did was call my mom, because I was going to explode if I didn't tell anyone. You'd think I just found out that I was going to become a parent or something. I checked her website a couple of days ago and my eyes popped open. Any fatigue that I was feeling beforehand vanished in the instant I saw the words "free download". So I got the free download to hold me over until April 25th. I just hope (please Amel) that her album is released on April 25th because her Bravebird album took upwards of three years to be realeased. They kept Changing the release dates. I didn't know what was going on, but I waited patiently until it was released in 2004. Which reminds me. On her old website called Blissgroup there was this animated GIF of three kids playing ring around the rosie. That was a nice graphic. I wish she kept it on blisslife. I can't wait for her new album. I am going to rush out (even if I have to call in sick, or maybe I will even do a no call, no show) and buy her album. In fact I will by two. I learned from the last time when I wore out Infinite Possibilities. I bought three of those. I had to buy two Groove Theory CD's and I ended up buying two Bravebirds, because I dropped my first one and cracked it. Now I am going to buy two Morning CD's. One as a keepsake, and another as a master copy, and burn copies to disc and wear them out. Can't you tell I have this all thought out already. I'm counting down the days. Now it seems like time is going slower! Hmmm I wonder why?

Unlikely Combination: Fur Coats and Squirrels

Recently I wrote a little bit about my Grandma Hattie in a journal entry. As stated in that entry she passed away. She died from complications from a stroke. When I got older I rarely saw her or talked to her much. I talked to her some when she stayed at our home for a while. After she passed away, my Mom, my Aunt Cyndi, my brother Jevon, my Sisters and I moved her things from her apartment. Most of it came to our home, and some of it was donated (I think to a organization for women who are domestic violence victims). Well anyways her two fur coats were kept in the closet in my bedroom (which is the attic).

Sunday when I came home from work, I grabbed my foot soaker and went to put some hot water in it. After I did this I came back to my bedroom and I saw Bouk and Jet, sitting next to the closet door. At first I was like, "I don't know why you two are staring at the door, there isn't anything in there". Then I heard something! So I got up and took my feet out of the water and walked over to the door and I moved the radiator that I had blocking the door so the cats won't get in there (Bouk ended up in the wall before, long story). When I opened it, I saw one of my Grandmothers fur coats lying on the floor, ripped completely to shreds. I mean it was mangled, and it made me upset. Not just because I didn't act when I first saw the cats by the door, but because I new I had this problem before. It never occurred to me that the squirrels would try and used my Grandmother's fur coats as part of there nest. Funny thing is I recently saw Animals Behaving Worse on PBS, and one of the segments was about a squirrel stealing ribbons made of cloth. The tan colored fur coat (this is real fur people, and they were old school) is finished, but I managed to save the dark brown coat. It's hanging on one of the blinds that is covering my window.



Imagine how I must have felt when I found out what had happen. I wanted to obliterate every squirrel within a 1500 mile radius of me and my Grandmother's fur coat. I was thinking about putting moth balls in my closet, but if a squirrel ate one it would most likely die. "Not that it's a bad thing", was floating through my brain. Then I remembered that something died in my wall, a couple of years back, and my entire bedroom had the most appalling stench that ever graced my nasal passages and penetrate my lungs. I suffered through it with candles and Air-Wick air fresheners for weeks, and finally it went away. Then there was one of my former co-workers (who oddly enough has a blog too, hers is on live journal). Three years ago she convinced me that it would be wrong to put moth balls in my closet or in my wall, because it would kill the squirrels, and the pigeons (yes I had a pigeon problem too, if you ever have this problem I recommend really loud music). Then she told me to get humane traps. I was like forget it, I am just SOL on this one and let it go. Now my grandmothers coat is damaged beyond repair and I am about 5 hours away from doing "SOMETHING"! I don't know what yet, but I am leaning toward moth balls. This would have been one of those Explicit Journal Entries, but that Subtitle Movie thing cheered me up yesterday. Thanks Ari, Mad Secretary, Omar, and Stephanie. All of yours had me cracking up. I needed it.

I told ya!

This is a rare Sunday post, but I just had to do it. L.O.B. found something interesting for all of us to see. There is this website called Bombay TV, that has movies that you can add your own subtitles to. I did mines just click here. What is it about? Lets just say I have a eccentric imagination. I warned you in the previous entry. I hope you like it. LOL

There won't be any Disclaimers! LOL

Only in my mind!

I finally finished my income taxes and sent them in the mail on Friday. I kept putting it off, saying I'll do them tomorrow, I'll do them on my next day off, I'll do them when I come home from work. Well I should have just did them, and got it done and over with. I remember last year I finished them as soon as I got the freakin' W-2's. Since we are talking about procrastination, I should mention that I was supposed to get a car last year, and I didn't. I kept saying that I'll wait until I get my tax return. That came and gone and this year I am saying the same thing. Hopefully I will get a car this year. (turning caps lock on) NO, I WILL GET A CAR THIS YEAR.

I changed my picture in my profile to the drawing of my sister Ablah's drawing (Chris' idea) that I posted in a previous entry. I kinda looked smug in the other picture, and I didn't like that. Heck I don't like taking pictures at all, but I force myself sometimes. I will probably try taking a new round of pictures, but I don't see this happening any time soon, especially since I haven't even charged the batteries for my camera in like a month. I was hoping for a (caps lock again) A WHOPPING SNOW STORM, with 20 inches or more. So far we haven't got it in the last 3-4 years. All the blizzards managed to go south or north of us. In some case they form after they pass us. It's like Rochester has an immunity for big storms. I don't remember seeing a giant needle appearing out of the blue stabbing the flower city in the stem, and hearing a voice saying, that'll make it all better now. Okay, maybe that was a little dumb, but I just wanted to make a sign and put it in the snow. It would have said, "Taking the lowest bidder to shovel our snow! Bidding starts at $5".

Sometimes I wish I can act on some of the silly things that pop in my head. I intended to act on that one, to see if someone would actually shovel our mountain for under five bucks. I have had other thoughts on my mind that were out of this world before. Once I imagined myself lying in the street, letting cars run over my back, because my back was hurting me (oh yeah, now that's the spot...Do it again).

Then there are times where I am like, "I could have sworn"! How does Mortal Kombat, and The Simpsons relate in Charles' head? Anyone that has ever played Mortal Kombat remembers the flying kick that Liu Kang makes when he attacks his enemies. For the life of me I could never understand what he was saying. At one point I wanted to know so bad that I kept picking Liu Kang whenever I was in battle, and I would keep doing the kick to listen to what he was saying. It sounded like Bruce Lee on crack cocaine. Where does the Simpsons come in? There was an episode of the Simpsons where the character Sideshow Bob, is released from Springfield prison on parole and decides to Kill Bart Simpson. When The Thompsons (er...The Simpons) arrive on Terror Lake, there is this one scene where Homer busts through Bart's door to his room with a knife in one hand and a plate of brownies in the other and he says, "Bart you want some brownies before you go to bed" really, really fast. After I heard this I decide that this is what Liu Kang is saying...Yep! With every thrust and every kick, yep this is what Liu Kang is saying when he does the Flying Kick! I remember when we were younger I had my brother rolling on the floor dying of laughter when I told him this. I still have that Mortal Kombat game On the Nintendo 64, and I still have the tape to that Simpsons episode floating around somewhere too. I wonder if I am the only one out there with crazy thoughts. Believe my I have some more.

Fill in the Blanks (Oscar Night)

Each question's color matches a blank line in a Sentence that I have written below. Answer the questions and line up each letter (A. B. C.) in the same order as the color blanks in the statement.

Fill in the Blanks 1st Salvo

You won’t ever catch Charles eating _ _ _ _ _ _!


Who is Charles’ favorite singer?
A. India Arie
B. Sade
C. Amel Larrieux
D. Mariah Carey
E. Teena Marie

My Nephew’s name is?
A. Jalani
B. Chris
C. Jevon
D. Andrew
E. Alligator

Where do I live?
A. Rochester, New York
B. New York City, New York
C. Charlotte, North Carolina
D. Montgomery, Alabama
E. Rochester, Minnesota

My Favorite TV Show, that is still on the air?
R. NCIS
S. LA Law
T. American Idol
U. Dynasty
V. Lost

Who is my favorite NFL Team?
H. Arizona Cardinals
I. Buffalo Bills
J. Denver Broncos
K. New England Patriots
L. Houston Texans

What is Charles’ favorite color(s)?
O. Pink
P. Orange
Q. Purple
R. Tied between Blue and Red
S. Black

Thursday Thirteen (round 2)

Thirteen Names That I have been given 1. Charles (Obvious) 2. Andrew (My Middle Name) 3. Drew (My Aunt Gwen) 4. Andy (Everyone in my family calls me this, because I am my fathers namesake) 5. Chuck (My High School best friend Pon) 6. Charlie Brown (My friend Randi) 7. Charlsie Walsie (My sister Ablah) 8. (LOL) Well I am having a hard time spelling this one, because I keep coming up with BRA (no not the women's undergarments). When we were little, my brother Jevon wouldn't call me by my name, he would say an abbreviated version of brother. The best I can do as far as spelling and pronunciation is concerned is Bruh 9. Buddy: I have no idea why. This girl named Arica that I knew from high school (which she rarely attended by the way), who also lived down the street from me used to call me this, and she had her entire family calling me this name. I wanted to go name my bat buddy and pop them upside the head every time they called me Buddy! I got your buddy right here buddy. 10. C.W. (Someone always has to used the initials right.) 11. Charlie (Not to be confused with Charlie Brown) In any case I hate being called either one, but for some reason whenever this girl named Zena would say Charlie, it would turn me on. I just loved her accent. 12. Chaz: I liked this one, although it is a typical "Charles" name. In fact I had a embroidered hat in middle school with the name Chaz on it. 13. Here is another difficult spelling: Ant'o'nee! One of my babysitters (well actually she was more than just a babysitter) used to call me that. Never could figure out why. Extra Credit: The initials (without using the J in Jr. ) in my name spell CAW, which is ironically the word used to describe that annoying sound made by my fan club....The Crows! Links to other Thursday thirteen's! Stephanie Galen

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And then I was 10

This is another old picture from my childhood. It was taken on Easter after we came from church in the town of Marion. This was taken at my grandfather's house on the front lawn. Can you figure out which one is me? ::hint:: I'm the tallest (still are) of the grandchildren. The one in the black suit is my cousin Chris. I haven't spoken to him in quite awhile, or his two sisters beside him. His sister Noretha is the tallest girl on the left, and his sister Norissa is the one in the center. My sister Chandra is in our grandmother Hattie's hands) It's amazing how we grow, and how far we have come over the years. Everyone in that picture except me has children.

My grandmother has since passed now. I used to be scared of her LOL. If she told me to do something, I'd do it. Over the years I realized that her mouth was scarier than her bite. She was a nice woman, and she really cared about us. She used to babysit my sister and I when we were little. Funny thing is she used to baby sit my sister Ablah too. When she passed my sister Ablah said that I didn't know how she felt, because grandma never babysat me. Well guess what, guess how wrong you were that time sis.

Hattie isn't really our blood relative, but she is our grandmother. She was there for us throughout our childhood. My mother's mom died when she was very young. I wish I could have met her, but for all intended purposes Hattie was our Grandmother.

Behind us there is a giant rock or a boulder if you will. You can see a little bit of it in the picture. I can guarantee you that my grandfather never expected his grandkids or his own children to make that rock a favorite spot to hang out. I don't know the exact reason, but my mom said that there used to be a curb over there. I used to sit on it a lot whenever we went to visit my grandfather. To the left of us there is a tree that had a swing on it. One day my cousin Chris was swinging on a swing set, and somehow he managed to hurt himself pretty badly on it. So my grandfather told my uncles to tear it down, so they did. Then one day we came back to visit and my grandfather had a make shift swing attached to the tree. Hey don't laugh, it worked, and it was fun.

over to the right of us there is the "woods". We were forbidden to go in there, because it was dangerous. However broke the rule once and my uncle Junior took my cousin Chris, James, and myself in there to see an old shed. I can still remember what it looks like, but I don't remember the purpose. It was fun though, I got to explore somewhere that I never been. It was pretty cool, and fun. Although I can remember my grandfather yelling at us to come from out of there. My grandfather's back yard was huge one of our family members whacked a ball pretty far and we had to run all of the way over to a tractor to find the ball. I remember this, because I wanted to ride the damn thing, but never got a chance too. We used to play chase, hide and seek, and tag. We even played softball back there. I just remembered that there was a chicken pen too. Those things could be noisy sometimes. It was pretty fun. I only wish that he owned it. I haven't seen the place since I was like 13 or 14. I miss the country...sigh! There is an interesting story about my grandfather. I have to get more details and then maybe I will write about him. He still owes me a trip to Philadelphia, that is if I ever get over my anxiety.