Saturday, December 30, 2006

Everyday Life 17: Precious Life

I do a lot of thinking when left alone at work. Usually things that leave an impact in my life cause me to think about these things for weeks at a time.

I completed the Xenosaga Trilogy (video games), and towards the end, I noticed and experience something. It was something that kind of bothered me. This may sound kind of weird to you, but bear with me. I played this game, and I got to know these character's and there personalities. When they hurt I hurt. When they smiled I smiled. So towards the end of the final game in the series, my heart broke. They started killing off some of the protagonists. Okay, so they killed off two, but that still affected me.

Jin Uzuki, the brother of one of the first characters in the beginning of the game (Shion Uzuki) gave his life to protect his Allies and friends from certain death, at the hands of there enemy, the Gnosis. It was done in dramatic fashion, and it made me very sad. I thought to myself, "Why did they have to kill Jin off. "He's the hero, the hero should always come out alive".

So I went to work today, and while I was there, I started thinking about life in General. Life is supposedly more precious than gold, yet blood is being spilled like it's "Fools Gold". So many lives are being snuffed out and there isn't anything that I can do about it.

Thanksgiving is one of the holiday's that is celebrated in our home. Noticed how I didn't write about it. It's because around 2 or 3 O'clock in the morning just before Thanksgiving is supposed to start, a young man's life was taken just down the street from our home. The police lights flashing up in my window, woke me up, and the sirens screaming down our street scared the living daylights out of me. My fear pales in comparison to what that young man's family must have and will be going through. I think his memorial is still up where he died. I heard that he was going to become a rapper. I'm not big on rap, but how do we know that he wasn't going to make it better? We won't never get that chance to find out.

What gives people the right to take another's life? How can they live with themselves? A beautiful person could be standing right next to me, and then there consciousness can dissipate in an instant. If only there was a way to prevent this. If only God had planted some kind of fail safe inside people, so they would feel what there victims felt. I even felt for Saddam Hussein. I know he killed millions of people, and I know he hates the US and it's citizens, but I can't say that I would want him dead. Then again the other option isn't good either. Murder's can spend the rest of there lives locked up, but will they regret taking the life, or will they regret getting caught and spending the rest of there lives lock up? I won't pretend to know the answer. If someone close to me, like my brother was killed, I don't know how I would respond. It's just that two wrongs don't make it right.

After the deep thought:

A few minutes before I closed the desk, there were two guys out in front of the store fighting. One had friends and they tried to break it up. The lone man must have said something, because the guy with friends came flying back toward the lone man and started yelling at him. I had to make them stop, by telling them that they are at a place of business. Who knows how that would have turned out. When will end? What will it take? This is another reason why I am losing faith in humanity's survival.

When will people open there eyes, and realize that life isn't "Fools Gold"

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

As Of Now!

Placing hand over Heart! (The Bible would be sacrilege)

I Charles Do Solemnly swear that I will not eat any junk-food of any kind for the next 365 days.

This includes:

Little Debbie snacks (oatmeal Creme pies, swiss rolls...etc)
Oreo Cookies
Reese's peanut Buttercups
banana pudding
Sour Patch Kids
ice cream (Excludes Popsicles)
Anything in The Candy aisle of the store I work at.
chili dip
cheese cake
fast foods (McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's)
certain TV dinners (I will eat Healthy Choice, but not Stouffer's, Marie Callender's or Swanson).<---Failed
I welcome anything else that anyone comes up with.

Why have I set this goal so high? Because, I have been eating mostly junk-food all of my life and there is no telling how much damage I have done to my arteries. My body is out of shape. On top of this I have high cholesterol.The idea of dying from a heart attack or, being trapped within the confines of my body by a stroke, doesn't appease any part of my mind or heart. I've tried this before, but I didn't post it in my blog. I did that on purpose, because I didn't have any expectations to live up too. Not to mention that I saw mushrooms that reminded me of Ritz crackers one day as I was walking to work. Now I will post it here for the world to see. Hopefully that will be enough incentive to get me going.

I will also entertain any suggestions on foods that I can eat (I'm All Ears)

Eventually, I may start asking for exercising tips as well.

Wish me luck, I'm going to need it.

Friday, December 22, 2006

Computer's End: New Beginning

We see our hero entering the stage. He turns on his computer, and it takes forever to load. When it loads the computer is only a shadow of it's former glory. After being chewed by the antagonist: The Computer Virus, our hero's ally has a whole bunch of obstacles to overcome.

The hero: Charles tries his hardest to restore his computer to better days, but to no avail. There are a whole list of issues.

  1. The Search Results tool has been munched on. "What do you want to search for?" Well actually that wasn't even up there. The only thing left was the search companion. If you have Windows XP, you know them as, Rover, Merlin, Courtney, and Earl. In my case I was stuck with Earl. Couldn't search for anything on my computer.
  2. Windows Media Player was chomped on good. There was nothing left, but an error message and the Icon.
  3. There were certain buttons on websites that couldn't be pressed (more on that later on in the post)
  4. Norton Anti-Virus was a no show. Charles pressed that button a number of times, and like the famous Quote from Star Trek fame, "Resistance is Futile".
  5. System Restore wouldn't work either, it would get half way done and then a pop-up would appear saying that it would not work. For some reason Charles would keep getting his hopes up during each attempt.
I'm curious, have any of you ever been on a hopeless or hapless quest? Where every turn you take leads you back to square one.

Case in point:

I tried to fix my computer without using my restore disk. Everywhere I turned lead to a brick wall. I tried to use the virtual technician for my Mcafee software that I recently bought, but I couldn't press the button on the web-page. Mcafee was too powerful for my computer anyways. My computer wasn't able to reload Norton Anti-Virus software either. Every time I would try, I get the same result, buttons that I couldn't press and the live update software loading itself 20 times or more. Heck, when I gave in and decided that I wasn't going to bother, I went and Checked AOL journals to see if anyone I read there had posted. I Checked Omar's AOL Journal, and not only couldn't I see any of the pictures he had on there, but I couldn't even pressed the button to open the comments on my screen. I had to go directly to the page of a particular post if I wanted to see or post comments.

So what do I do? I decide that I am going to "put my pet out of it's misery". Reluctantly, I walk upstairs to my bedroom, and get the "poison", that will be the conduit for the end of my computer's suffering. Remember the "Hapless" question I posed to above. Well I do, and let me tell you, I never felt so helpless, frustrated, and useless, in my entire life. It was if something or someone, bigger and badder had entered the stage. It was as if something or someone was there, waiting in the wings with a diabolical plan that was always three steps ahead of me. Why you ask??? I don't know if I ever posted an entry on my AOL blog about it, but a year after I got my computer it's DVD player fizzled out on me. When I went to get my restore disk, I saw this...

Check the bottom right corner. Yep, it's a restore DVD. Some computer's get Restore CD's. I just happened to get a DVD. What a tangled web, my invisible adversary weave. I wonder, if all of this was planned from day one. This may seem a bit like paranoia, but what if I tell you that I had an invisible ally on my side.

What are the odds someone (oh lets say me) going on vacation at the same time that my computer decides it's ready for Dr. Jack Kevorkian? What are the odds of me finding a DVD drive for my computer on sale for $39.99. Where is Data or Spock when you need them? Anyhow, I found one at best buy, and came home and installed it. It took me a little over an hour, but I managed to get it working, and I am now the proud owner of a mismatching pair of disk drives.

Finally I was able to bid farewell to my woes and the woes of my computer. I erased the virus, and unfortunately, I erased all of my blogging history. Pictures, journal entries, ideas, potential posts, poems, HTML code that I had saved, animated GIF's that Brandy, Donna, and another friend made for me, music that I downloaded from and that I got from a friend, and the pictures from my sister's baby shower. Fortunately for me, the latter is still saved in the memory card inside of my old digital camera. Memories wiped clean, because someone wanted to design something to destroy rather than create. My computer may be a machine, but it was filled with memories. Memories that I had to destroy as a precautionary measure, to ensure that they to wouldn't infect my computer again, when I re-installed Windows XP.

There is a quote from my favorite comic. "With Great Power, Comes Great Responsibility". Whenever someone comes out with an great invention, there is always someone out there that finds a way to manipulate it, or turn it into a horrible monstrosity. They find the loophole and not give two shits about others feelings.

To the creator of the computer virus: If you are still around, and by some chance you are reading this, I hope your computer gets infected too. You deserve to know how it feels to be robbed of something special...Memories that fill ones Heart.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

What a conversation and Theory

A conversation that I heard!

Camera Panning on a Bar at a Corner of the Universe.

A being walks through the door of the bar, and sits at the Bar and proceeds to talk to the bar-keep.

Trojan Boss: How you doin?

Com Puter: Fine sir, how about you?

Trojan Boss: This is a fine establishment you got running here!

Com Puter: Thank You, oh I didn't get your name?

Trojan Boss: That's not important, you can just call me friend.

Trojan Boss: In fact you can call me your best friend, and as your friend I can give you protection for a modest fee.

Narrator: A whole bunch of other beings walk in through the bar door!

Com Puter: Who and where did all of these people come from.

Trojan Boss: Oh them, they work for me, don't worry they like it here.

Com Puter: They are crowding the place and slowing down my response time.

Trojan Boss: I know isn't great, and look one of them has managed to hog two of your most favorite browsers all to himself.

Com Puter: Dammit, my owner won't be pleased! What should I do?

Trojan Boss: NO Problem, I have a solution for you.

Narrator: Trojan boss pulls out a box.

Trojan Boss: here is a defense for my friends, and all it will cost you is a modest fee every 365 days.

Com Puter: Okay I'll take it, are you sure it's safe?

Trojan Boss: Of course, it will get rid of those nasty bugs in NO time. Better hurry up, it looks like one of them is heading for AOL Software.

Narrator: Com Puter hands him the cash and opens the contents of the box.

Com Puter: whoa, that was close!

Trojan Boss: See if you have protection, you don't have to worry about those little buggers.

Com Puter: Your the one that brought them in here, they wouldn't have known about my "fine establishment" if it weren't for you.

Trojan Boss: If I didn't bring them here, someone else would have, and they wouldn't offer to protect you like I will.

Trojan Boss: Adios

Com Puter: Four letter words

You know that is what computer virus's seem like they were created for in my opinion. I just don't see any other purpose, other than someones idiotic sense of "Just to see if I can do it". I bet someone created the computer virus just so they could create the computer anti-virus software. Okay I may be wrong, but why are people like me going out there, spending about $50 a year on anti-virus software? Because we have too right? But why do we have too? Who created the "virus", the "Trojan" and the "spy and malware".

It makes me wonder!

If there was a way to create a virus, there should be a way to delete one permanently. I don't pretend to know anything about them, but shouldn't there be a way to wipe them out over the Internet with one fell swoop? I bet there is a possibility, but I know it wouldn't be profitable.

Which brings me to a conversation that I had with my computer.

Charles: What's wrong computer?

Computer: I don't feel good? I keep getting these LUXCOMS~1.EXE (20 at one point) files that won't stop popping up.

Charles: Let me have a look see! Hmmmm, I have know idea let me look and see what I can find online. It says that the LUXCOMS~1.EXE file is an file extension for Live Update for your Norton System Works. There is a virus attacking you

Computer: Delete it!

Charles: I can't! (panicking) I know what I will do, I will uninstall it

An hour goes by!

I try uninstalling and the damn thing won't. I go to Symantec's website, and I find the Norton Removal Tool, but that doesn't work. So I systematically remove every file one by one until I can use the removal tool. Took me another hour, because there some files that refused to be deleted. Then I went and bought McAfee Total Protection, and that wouldn't work. Every time I would try to download it to my computer, the program would freeze. It turns out that my computer doesn't meet the system requirements.

I have a virus attacking a anti-virus program, and I have a anti-virus program that is too much for my computer. I am at a lost. the only thing I can do is take my chances and not use anti-virus protection. I bet I'd have a better chance with a condom protecting my computer at this point. After all of that, now my search program is damaged. I wonder what else is ruined. I think I will end up reinstalling my windows software, and starting from scratch. I'm thinking about it. Heck I'm thinking about putting a new computer on layaway or something.

Friday, December 15, 2006

A quick note

The previous post wasn't meant for anyone in Blogland okay. I'm just frustrated over all of the He said she said bull that people seem to want to tell me. Whether it was gossip or my ears and brain being a shoulder to cry on. I can't take it, I just can't take it right now. I have problems too, and I am sure everyone else has one, or more in some way, shape or form too.

Again, it wasn't meant for anyone here!


Tuesday, December 12, 2006


Cast Members

Charles: Me-Oldest sibling

CC: Second Oldest sibling/oldest sister

Sequel: Second oldest sister*

Prequel: Youngest Sister*

*Okay Sequel is older than Prequel, but if you think about it in the "Star Wars" sense, then you will understand why I gave them those names.

If there is one thing that I hate in this world, it's Drama

I don't want no drama for your mamma, I don't like drama queens, I don't like drama kings. If it were up to me there wouldn't be any dramas on TV.

Why do some people feel the need to put emphasis on things that aren't bad to begin with. You want drama-Here I have some Drama for you!

Now that my siblings are getting older they are starting to do things that are, well a bit questionable.

If there is one thing I hate its sneaking. I know I am sneaky, and if I have to I will have a plan laid out with an escape route, but when someone else is trying (trying being the key word) to be sneaky with me nearby, it really irritates me.

If there is one thing that my step-father and I agree on, its that we don't trust the friends that my two youngest sister's have.

4 months ago!

One night the Sequel invited her friend over to stay the night. I wake up in the middle of the night, and I go downstairs to use the...Make a donation. As I am walking out of the donathroom (you know I have some pretty good hearing) I hear a conversation going on in my Sequel's room. It's not coming from two girls, its coming from a boy and a girl. So I decide to go back into the bathroom and I sit there to see if anyone comes out of the Sequel's room. No one budges, so I go downstairs and low and behold, Sequel's friend is downstairs with some boy in our living room. What do I do? I decide to go online with our computer to annoy her. She tells me that she is trying to sleep. I tell her sorry, and then her and the boy sneak upstairs to the Sequels room. Shhh...I think she thought that I didn't know.

The Sequel lets her friend's boyfriend out of the house, while I am on the computer still (one down), however the other boy remains. Eventually I get off of the computer and I sit in the kitchen in a chair until morning comes. I left out the part that made me stay up until the morning. It really, really pissed me off. Lets just say that if you were in my place, and you saw what I saw, you probably would have flipped out.

Morning comes and I am hidden on the side of the refrigerator, sitting in a chair so my sister can't see me (I told you I am sneaky). I hear her check the computer room to see if I was there. When she finds out that I am not, she gives the "Dead Man Walking" the all clear to come downstairs so he could leave. As they go out the kitchen door that leads to the exit door outside, I get out of the chair and I confront them. She was shocked, and the boy was scared, and I was in a rage from hell. I don't know what kept me from ripping his head off, but whatever it was (guardian angel perhaps...his or mines) kept me in check. She didn't explain herself, and when I brought up what the part that kept me up until morning, she said it had nothing to do with them. I let the boy go, and told her to never bring him here again, and I told her that she is disrespecting mom. After that I let it be. I didn't ever tell my mother, because she...well she...her health. I ignored the sequel for a few weeks until I could get over what she did.

Last month

Prequel invited her friend over! I was upstairs in my room watching some TV, when all of a sudden a familiar smell begin to creep up to my room. Eventually it became stronger and stronger, until I couldn't take it anymore. So I went downstairs to see where it was coming from. It was coming from the Prequel's room. I open the door without knocking and I ask what is up. Prequel said, "Nothing", but I did notice her friend cautiously and sneakingly trying (key word again) to put the top on the prequels shoe cleaner can.

Kids and Aerosol cans don't mix! Parents don't allow your kids to have access to them without your presence.

After the Sequel's events and all of the other events that happened I didn't want to be the bad guy. So I went downstairs to CC and asked her to go upstairs and investigate. She was hesitant herself, but she did, and lets just say that she wasn't any help. When my mother came home, I told her, and I left it alone.

Last week

I don't know what was said, because I wasn't outside. I do know what happened though. I heard a lot of yelling and a lot of screaming, from my attic bedroom. I come downstairs hearing CC yelling at my mom and The Prequel. I hear the prequel crying, and when she comes in the house, she has a red wring around her eye. CC punched prequel in the eye for saying something. I stayed out of that one, I wanted NOTHING to do with it. I let my mother handle it and that was that. I'm surprised that Prequel didn't get a black-eye. She was lucky! Whatever she said, I bet it was very Harsh. Sometimes her big mouth gets her into trouble. Prequel is only 11 years old and she is one of the biggest Drama Queens I have ever met. I miss the old Prequel, the one that was mature for her age. I guess she just "grew up".

There....There is your drama, you Drama Eaters. Does this satisfy your appetites? I just get tired of hearing how Person A has Slept with Person B's Boyfriend, or how someone has spread this nasty rumor about someone around. It's CRAZY and now people do this over there cell phones. Just last night, I saw something unusual. Twin Girls...Teenagers on Cell-phones walking out of the store talking about the drama in there lives (aloud).


Friday, December 08, 2006


It was 14 minutes until I had to leave work,
This woman came in, said something that hurt

Told me that it was cold outside and it was going to get worse,
"The low will be 14 degrees" as she is riffling through her purse

Processing my 14th bill was the last thing on my mind,
I didn't bring my scarf, and the wind is being unkind

My friend is complaining about her stupid engine,
it has to get warm, before she can begin,
her drive home, but I don't see why she's complaining,
I don't have a car so my patience is wearing thin.

"Don't you have a remote control starter",
"Yes, but somebody will steal my car"

At least you have a car!

Walking with my feet
Eventually walking in the street
14 degrees will do wonders for your cold drinks
It's just too bad that it can't do nothing for me
Just turn my legs into peptide concrete

Free at last as I step into the breeze,
the cold air clears my sinuses and helps me breathe

It's cold as hell, and I can barely see,
only the snow drifts and the desert in the streets

I forgot what it's like to tread in this weather,
If I was a horse than the wind is my tether

This is my last winter on foot, I can't take this any longer
slap the person who said, "Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger

14 weeks and 14 days,
until I can say those 14 words that I like to say

"I'm glad it's spring, because it is my most favorite season of the year!"

Friday, December 01, 2006

Head's Up!

Before I get started let me just say, DON'T pick me, if by some chance God were to have everyone on Earth choose a person to look through there eyes to Judge Humanity.

Because of a letter that I got in the mail Monday, My faith in humanity has been shaken. I got letter claiming that I won a Jackpot! (a sarcastic Yay)

Here is what it says:


We are pleased to inform you that you are one of the declared winners of the DE-LOTTO SWITZERLAND SWEEPSTAKES held on JULY30TH, 2006 in the 2ND category. Ticket serial NO 387450146 drew the lucky winning NO38-44-66-79-91.

We have made many unsuccessful attempts to contact you regarding this winning. You are therefore entitled to the sum of $250,000.00 US Dollars. This is from a total prize money of $5 million US dollars that was shared and presented among the other 20 declared winners. Please note that all the participants were selected through a random computer ballot
system drawn from over 50,000 names.

Your claim number is DH/SUL-0011 and has been assigned to our North American Claims Affiliate. To expedite the processing enclosed is the check of $4880 US dollars which has been deducted from your winning. The sole purpose of this check is for the payment of applicable Government Taxes on your big winnings.


Please do not attempt to use this check until you call. You are advised to contact your claim agent immediately for further clarification as indicated below within 5 business days.


It may sound like it makes sense, but it doesn't. Every time I have ever seen lottery winners on TV , I have always heard of the taxes being taken directly from the Jackpot.


Why would someone send a letter in the mail, without a return address on the envelope???


I never entered any kind Lotto Contest in Canada, Switzerland or Even North Carolina for that matter.


I am a Western Union Agent (they don't know this I know). I have heard of this scam before, in fact we had and elderly woman come in and try to send the money (her own money), but our manager had her talk to a Western Union Operator.

Then there is this Check that they sent!

It says it has security features on the back, but there nothing fancy back there at all. In fact the only thing fancy about it is on the front. That gold sticker you see. If I had went and cashed this thing it, and sent the money. I would have had to pay this back. I would have been down the $4880.00, plus the $135.00 dollars to send $2975.00 to them.

I was surprised when I got this in the mail. I thought they only prey on the elderly. I am far from wrinkles, so I guess maybe they think I am gullible.

PLEASE, If you get something in the mail from Nicaragua or Canada From Mutual Financial Services or from any other "company" telling you that you won a Jackpot, don't follow there instructions. I know people hold on to hope that they will win big, but you will end up losing big time. If what I said isn't enough, contact Western Union or Money Gram first. This would save you a big time headache

I went to work Wednesday and showed it to my boss lady. She wanted to call Western Union and have me talk to them. I didn't want to, so she asked if I didn't mind if she called and spoke with them. I was okay with that, so she called them. They told her to call the police. So she called 311 for the non-emergencies. 311 ended up connecting her to 911, and they said they would send an officer.

Well five hours later an officer did arrive, and if you think I was mad about the mail I got, think again. I was more upset when the officer told me that there was nothing that could be done. She said she could file a report and take the letter and check, but eventually they would just throw them out. She said that all of it is considered junk mail. She also said something about it being outside of there jurisdiction, because the letter came from Canada

There are people out there that are being hoodwinked out of thousands of dollars just so some greedy A-Hole can fill there stomachs and pay there bills, and there is nothing that the police can do about it. Personally, I felt as if the officer didn't even care. Like she didn't want anything to do with it, and well if she is telling the truth than, our Justice system sucks.

Score one for the bad guys I guess! They seem to be winning a lot as of late, but then again my father did tell me something that stuck when I was a kid. This is Satan's system of things.