Thursday, February 15, 2007

Our store took another big blow. I not sure I should even post this, but it's been on my mind a lot. One of my co-workers was pregnant. I was told that she always wanted to have children. Well She gave birth on Sunday. She was actually due on Groundhog Day, but for some reason she surpassed that date.

By nine days.

The doctor was going to induce the labor, but they kept saying, "if she doesn't go into labor, then they would induce it". One day turned into two and two turned into nine. The baby was 7lbs. 3oz., and it turned out that he was too big for her birth canal. The doctors had to perform a C-section. When they did this they found out that the baby's life signs were unstable. So they had to put him in an ICU. That was what I was told by a co-worker the first day that I heard the news. Yesterday when I came to work, I was told that the baby has no brain activity whatsoever. For all intents and purposes the baby is dead, albeit his body is alive and on life support. I can describe how much sadness I feel for her, just thinking about it now makes me want to cry for her. I can't imagine what she is going through, I just know she doesn't want to give up on her son. She gave life to him for nine months, just to lose him because of a doctors decision. I wouldn't wish this kind of sorrow on my worse enemy.

I don't even know what to say to her when I see her again. Everything in my life seems so trivial at this point and I don't want to say anything to upset her. Honestly I'm scared my heart is there, but my words get jumbled when I am nervous and then my good intentions turned to an insensitive comment. "How are you doing", is the worst thing you can say to a parent who has lost a child. I said that once to someone and I didn't realize how stupid a question it was. The best thing I can to is say I'm sorry. I'm sorry for your loss, and I hope that God will bless you.

I sincerely hope that this experience doesn't stop her from trying again. I hope that she can be happy.


Chelle said...

sometimes saying nothing and just being there is the best. without knowing her, i can't say. poor thing. my thoughts are with her and her family.


Ari said...

Oh, I'm so sorry for her hon. It is very hard to go through. Give her time.


Chris said...

Six ways to comfort the grieving
-Walter Anderson's Confidence Course

1. Don't pretend
2. Don't try to make the bereaved feel better
3. Don't fear tears
4. Do let them talk
5. Do reassure
6. Do call again

I'll scan and email the 3 pages to you tonight.

My Blog